Hello readers, So I have another update on my life. The whole guy I was talking to thing didn't work out. We are to different and he defiantly wasn't my type. I'm looking for someone who isn't into game, who has had a real relationship and knows that they just want something serious. I thought we had a connection but after taking a step back I realized that I am an asshole and just wanted someone to be there for me because i'm not by the people who normally makes me feel whole and it sucks. He acts like a child though and I cant do that, all he did was stare at girls when we were together. Commenting on them and they were these skinny skinny blondes and I am far from that so I just felt less I guess. I don't know if I will ever find someone who honestly makes me feel larger than life. I just I will have to keep waiting and just keep to myself. I think that focusing on school and stay low will just be better for the long run. Also it's 1:23 am and I just finished the two chapters of math work and I have to get up at 7 am and read two chapters... This is my life and currently I'm just trying to get use to it.
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So just an update of my life I'm going to my third week of school and I'm already talking to someone on campus.... Now i'm not rushing anything and I just like his vibe. Hes a dork and I think he's funny. He's different from the guys I normally go for and I honestly think its an awesome change for me and it makes me so happy. I think he feels the same way because I know he was flirting last night and were kinda going on a date on campus. But yesterday when we were talking on campus after class he told me he was going to ask another girl for her number in our class we have together. So I don't know I'm not going to expect much for a little while, but hopefully this goes good because he makes me laugh. And he's a Yankees fan in Cincinnati like WTH! So I'm sorry for this update being so late since I haven't blogged in a couple of days! Oh... I also got a job!Hello readers! so I haven't posted in a few days just due to some stuff going on with school, some test and home work. Okay so I didn't really know how to title this but I am trying to figure out what I want to do for my birthday this year! I turn 18 on September 29th and I want to go out, but with who? All my friends are 12 hours away and I don't want to stay home and whatever so I think I'm going to go down town and fuck some shit up! I don't know how but I am going to make this the best birthdays ever. Maybe I'll come home with some piercings and a new hair color and maybe even a tattoo! You only live once and I plan on making this shit count and my mother might be mad but you know what oh well! Love you mom! So if anyone has any suggestions on my plans and would like to tell me how to live my life for one night leave me a comment! As always have a great night and thanks for reading this pointless blog I promise guy I'm getting better!So after I wrote my original new update on my blog and I was almost set to publish it and all I had to do was put the pics up from the day on the lake (original topic of the update ) I distracted myself and went on facebook. I have been hearing about this hurricane that was going threw Texas/Huston, Well I was on the lake all day and wasn't on my phone and didn't know what was going on until I went on my facebook and people were sharing #prayforhuston and I saw pictures of all the flooding and videos of familys being resucude out there house with nothing but there clothes on there backs and it was heart breaking and I go back and read over my " new update" Only to find that it was stupid. I wrote about kids complaining, tipping my kayak and other stupid stuff when so much shit is going on in my country and so many family's have nothing but each other because the water has taken everything! So that being said, Be thankful and appricate what you have because someone can have it so so so much worse then us! My prayers and heart goes out to those in huston right now! They say the flooding in texas is record breaking and god only knows how much worse it will get! #PRAYERSFORHUSTON! (These pictures are not mine!) So I don't know how to feel.... I miss all my friends so much and my best friend who even before I moved planned a trip to come and stay and see me. Well her boyfriend is in the military and is at basics, His graduation is some time in October ( the month she planned to come here) and I get that she wants to see him because I would want to be there if my boyfriends graduation but now she doesn't plan on coming out at all. I said I might be able to come back home around Christmas and I told her just to come out a month later for thanksgiving. Now name 5 places that are open on thanksgiving besides for food stores. Well she is a dog groomer and I know she isn't grooming dogs on thanksgiving and it's just one day and she was just like I can't. Like I know it's a holiday but I'm going to be leaving my family around Christmas to come see you. I don't know I just don't even want to go back home anymore. Like I shouldn't be the only one putting in effort to still see and communicate with my friends because snapchat is the only time I hear from them and that's because we had streaks before I left. Now before everyone is like " Wow, she is a selfish bitch" My best friend and I were together everyday! Her and her boyfriend ( who I love dearly ) honestly would go weeks with out seeing each other. He would not pay his phone bill, not answer his phone for day and spaz on her when she would like hunt him down! I don't know I still just feel so lonely ! I guess maybe making new friends and possible my only hope to be happy, I have thought about just getting a new phone number and deleting everything. Then just leave it like that but there all to close to my family. I would never be able to just do that! ( The song honestly has nothing to do with this, but it was the song I was listening to while writing this )Okay, so for the past few weeks I have been watching tons of videos and reading different sites about dying my hair. My friend is also a hair dresser and last night I was so set on dying my hair a burgundy color or a dark red. I'm a natural strawberry blonde and I put blonde highlights in my hair a few times to make my hair even more blonde but I have never done my full head and I get so nervous I won't like it. Well last night I dyed my hair and I am absolutely in love with it! I was so worried that it wouldn't look right an I would hate it and not want to leave my house! So I used the Olia by Garnier, The intense auburn shade 4.60. Now I followed the directions and for some reason my hair didn't pick up all the color so I had to open the second box and use that which I left in longer and my hair really picked it up and it looks amazing! What I will say is if you have never dyed your hair or have never done anything other than a blow out with your hair DO YOUR RESEARCH! I have put high lights in my hair for the past 3 years and It's never been that noticeable! So I do recommend this brand if your using box dye, Hair is a canvas have fun with it; Make it your own!I always come to school like a half hour to an hour early. Does anyone else do this or am I just a crazy person. Anyways I'm here till 1 or 2 so I don't know why I do this to myself, but in high school I had a English teacher my freshman year that was an ass but he always told our class that " Early is on time, On time is late and late is unacceptable..." So ever since high school i'm always at school so early... I'm just a spaz oh well! Have a good day to all the students out there!
Can someone tell me what Beauty is? Some say its the eye of the beholder but how does one determine if it's beauty? Some say you have seen something beautiful when it takes your breath away and it can't be unseen. Well I guess I have never truly seen beauty... and I suppose no one has ever seen beauty in me either. I have never be in love and have never been looked at in a magical way. Maybe it's just not for me. Maybe the world knows i'm better off by myself. I feel better by myself honestly and I can do a lot. I don't depend on others. But watching movies and seeing old couples happy and the looks they give each other. Any girl would want that from someone. Now another thing is I have trust issues, maybe thats why I can't love someone or see the beauty in someone because I can't let someone see the real me. So they keep there real personality hidden... I just miss feeling happy and I think when I was back home and I had all my friends. They distracted me from that empty feeling of not having a boyfriend. I don't know I'm just thinking. For anyone who reads this if you have any suggestions on me opening up to those around around me and let me know what your definition of beauty!
So today I started college and i'm pretty sure that these pictures really catch my mood. But It was a good day and the whole school for the most part was freaking out about the solar eclipses. But I think I'm so focused on just getting done with school.... And it's only the first day but because I want to get done with it hopefully it will go quicker and a guy I met at this meet and greet thing last week is so cool and I really do love chillin with him. He was like "so today I told a girl I was gay and she had a heart attack like cant you tell I'm gay" and I was pissing my pants. He admitted I'm one of the only people who had never reacted to the news he was gay. And I think that's sad like there shouldn't be a reaction like it's just whatever, Its's like when people react over seeing a interracial couple and I'm like who cares it's no ones business... But yes over all a very good day. I hope everyone else that's going back to school has a great first day and rest of the year! Try hard and never give up! Give 100% to yourself and your work!
So today I went to a UC " Meet and greet " and I think it was the best decision. I met some awesome people and found some friends which was honestly a Huge fear that I wouldn't be able to make friends and I would be alone all threw college. But I wasn't even there more than an hour and a half and I made some. I'm now feeling really confident and I'm ready to start school on Monday and meet up with Quinton! Now tomorrow I have to go and buy shoes and I'm all set with school! I'm so excited!
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Getting to Know The Face Behind The Screen!Hello, My name is Hayley I'm 18 and has just started college at the University of Cincinnati. It's a large change. Making new friends and leaving my friends behind in New Jersey. My major is early education. This blog is going to track my changes and struggles. Moving to a new city and starting a new school is all just part of my dope life and new beggings! |